Idaho is full of friendly people and beards. While this seemed to set my trip up to be a great success, all in all, it was a disappointment.
Each day I spent three or more hours in the University of Idaho clinic, running through movement pattern assessments. The athletic trainers were great and I felt like I was in good hands. But it seemed something would get corrected and I would feel ok, only for things to revert back to its old pattern.
I gave these guys a hard case. I walked in on crutches, with a boot, not knowing what was going on in my right foot, and having less of an idea of what was causing the pain in my left leg. I was the definition of a mess. I can honestly say they did all they could to help me. This last week I was diagnosed with a stress fracture in my foot. It’s been a long 5 weeks so far of no running, especially since I had built up my volume to the highest it’s been in years, and I was feeling stronger.
This is, by far, the hardest part of being an athlete. Over the years I feel like I take 2 steps forward, and then 3 steps back, only to have no idea what step I’m actually on anymore. But I’m not upset. Sometimes you have to eliminate possibilities before you can find the right answer.
I’ve been reminded of the many blessings that are consistently being poured over me, even now. I have a job I love. How many people can say that going to work actually makes their day better? I can ride my bike and swim all day long, which are two of my favorite things. I have people who love me and people to love. I have food to eat and a roof over my head.
And you know what I am most thankful for right now? I’m not a professional triathlete. My elite license expired at the end of last year. Due to these injuries, I deliberately didn’t race on a national scene. So why am I thankful for this? It’s allowed me to take a step back and evaluate the bigger why. And it’s stopped this feeling of “I have to be doing this” and “I’m expected to do that.”
I’ve had time to answer my why and I’ve come up with a plan going forward.
My plan starts with getting healthy. I’m able to bike and swim and I will do so to my heart’s content with the understanding that I can keep myself relatively fit. I am well aware this isn’t proper training.
Just because I can’t run, doesn’t mean life can’t be great. Somehow this was hard for me to grasp.
I’ve decided I would rather turn a new leaf mentally fresh and a few steps behind in my fitness than slightly fitter and mentally dragging.
I have no expectations to live up to from sponsors. No points to chase. Of course that’s what I want–to chase that podium as an elite athlete–but I’m going to be here, until I am there.
All man kind is divided into three classes: those that are immovable, those that are movable, and those that move.” ~Benjamin Franklin
I haven’t stopped moving, I’m just finding my own way.
Thanks to everyone who has supported me on this journey. Your encouragement means the world, and I’m so happy to have you in my corner.